Did you know that fish could have longer ears, and Earth is colonised by a mega-colony of ants?

We got a call which asked us not to post any more news on the Russian girls. Your posts could be morallly corrupting, we were warned, and there might be young readers of an impressionable age who are liable to be degraded by the links you provide. We are agreement with that hypothesis, but then, when you get news like this, what are you going to do about that?

A New Zealand man who claimed he was raped by a wombat and that the experience left him speaking with an Australian accent has been found guilty of wasting police time.

-Telegraph.

The police thought they have reasons not to believe this unlikely tale- wombats are native to Australia and are not to be found in New Zealand. The man has been sentenced to do seventy-five hours of community work.

Except for this story, we assure you, decent readers of impeccable character, there will be no more smut. Instead, we'll have stories such as

A teenage girl in Sweden learned the hard way some reptiles do not like to be pointed at -- especially when the hands are within biting range.

The girl was bitten Monday by a spectacled caiman, a close relative of alligators and crocodiles, at Furuviken Park in eastern Sweden several hours north of Stockholm, The Local reported. She got stitches and bandages at Gavle County Hospital.

-UPI

Hope you relish stories like this, and this-

May be you heard that there are plans to sink carbondioxide in the oceans, to avoid global warming? It looks like a great technical idea, the sort of wizardry that has brought our planet to the place that it is now. But then, may be, this is not good news for the fish: they won't die away, it is only that they will get bigger ears-

Listen up! Carbon dioxide being absorbed by the oceans is having a puzzling effect on fish -- their ears get bigger.

Now, that doesn't mean you're going to reel in the Mr. Spock of the sea. Fish ears are inside their bodies.

But, as in humans, their ears perform a major role in sensing movement and whether the animal is upright -- abilities that are important for survival.

-Discovery

And finally, as if we didn't have enough worries,

A single mega-colony of ants has colonised much of the world, scientists have discovered.

Argentine ants living in vast numbers across Europe, the US and Japan belong to the same interrelated colony, and will refuse to fight one another.

The colony may be the largest of its type ever known for any insect species, and could rival humans in the scale of its world domination.

-BBC